This last week I tried an experiment on myself with nutrition to see if it could work. I decided that I would try to eat close to what My FitnessPal recommends for my weight and goals, well MFP recommended I eat an insane amount of calories, this was due to my exercise level. Of course being a bariatric person, I wasn’t able to eat close to the 1800-2000 it recommended, but I skimmed along the surface at about 14-1600, fully thinking that when I got on the scale today for my “weigh in Wednesday” that I would magically be down…..I wasn’t L

I was, in fact, UP .4lbs, now this could be due also to the fact that I just resumed weight training and while I’m not currently lifting heavy weights for the purpose of building muscle….I know gasp.

I am still lifting and with that comes the restoration of muscle, which will always weigh more than fat. I knew that there was a possibly that I would get on the scale and it would be up. So here we are.

It would be a completely different story if I were up while lifting weights and nutrition was on point, but that’s not today’s case.

Nutrition, which I’m convinced now more than ever after this little experiment, will be the bane of my existence. Shoot, this struggle has been the ongoing feeder for most of my blog posts.

So here I am confessing that my harebrained attempts at trying to eat for pleasure while trying to lose weight DO NOT work, at least for me anyway. Kudos to those of you who can enjoy your favorite extras while losing weight, I’m just not one of those girls. I’ve been digging my nails in, kicking and screaming, hoping and wishing I was, but I’m just not. So today’s revelation has brought to me a new found clarity about my priorities and goals, so prepare for me to get brutally honest in today’s blog as well as future posts to come. This journey is not easy, but I most definitely intend to win at it!!


So my highest weight was 315… this was the day I walked into a bariatric surgeon’s office to find out about the sleeve surgery. She told me to expect to get to 222 with the sleeve. At the time I was prideful, thinking I would do better than that. I have since learned that pride always comes before the fall.

The lowest weight I’ve hit on the scale since the start of this whole journey was 207.6 on April 14, 2015. At this point, I had been eating very bland, methodically and started doing intermittent fasting. I was so hyper focused on getting under 200 pounds that I didn’t even celebrate the fact that 207 was probably the smallest I had been since high school. Looking back, I wished I would have reveled in that more, but I didn’t….you know what they say? Hindsight is 20/20.

So my surgeon’s goal weight was 222. My goal weight in the first year was 215 (putting me at 100pounds lost from my highest weight) I know that I can get back to 215, because my body hit 207. Now granted once I hit that lowest weight I stopped having periods and I was a mess. I’d seen an OB/GYN and basically was re-diagnosed with PCOS, so in honesty it’s a miracle that I go that low WITHOUT meds for PCOS, it was all through diet and exercise, which has been the key to it all since 2014.

Diet and exercise, led to my lowest scale weight to date, but also threw my migraine into remission, something else that is nothing short of a miracle.

So while I’ve been over here in the land of craziness…..job loss, move across the United States, stress etc, trying to incorporate foods back into my diet that have no business being there…. Not only for weight loss reasons, but also for actual health reasons. Today’s weigh in smacked me in the face with reality, a wakeup call, if you will.

I’m done with the nonsense. Sure it was fun. Of course, processed carbs are delicious, I love pretzels, cookies, cake with the best of them. I adore peanut butter, but guess what these foods don’t adore me.

In fact, they wreak havoc inside my body, then throw in bitter cold temperatures something I have no control over and it’s a migraine just asking to happen.

So I’m here today to say a few things……

I’m done….. D.O.N.E. with the crap food

Back on my Missouri plan I go when I was losing 8lbs a month.

At today’s weigh in, I weighed in at 236, which only puts me at a total of 79lbs lost from my highest weight, this is UNACCEPTABLE to me….today, but in the same breath I want to take a moment to celebrate the fact that I have lost SEVENTY-NINE pounds, which is basically my 10 year old, AND I’m not throwing in the towel, saying screw it and giving up, also something I would have done a few years ago. Nope this is a new day.


So here are my goals, after today’s time of refocus:

Weight Loss Goals for 2016….

  • 8lbs a month

I want to get back to losing 8lbs a month for starters. I’ll be trimming down my caloric intake to roughly 1150 daily.  High protein, moderate carb. (Carb meaning from clean sources: fruit, vegetables, sweet potatoes, rice cakes, quinoa etc), no added sugar sources outside of limited fruit

  • 4 Weight Loss Goals in 2016
    • Goal 1= 222
    • Goal 2=215 (this puts me at 100lbs lost from my highest weight, again)
    • Goal 3=207
    • Goal 4=197 (this puts me 100lbs from day of surgery, unknown if I will hit it, but I’m putting it out there)

Other Goals for 2016

Since my family enjoys eating lunch out after church I will still eat with them but I will eat as clean as possible, meaning a grilled chicken salad etc. I’m planning to only schedule 11 cheat days a year and I will figure out what those days are later today and blog about that in another post. I like this idea, it was from a bariatric friend’s program, but for me I like it because I know when it’s coming and I can really think about what I want to enjoy on that day for a meal.

There will be no alcohol in 2016, yes I do enjoy a glass of wine, BUT alcohol isn’t going to contribute to my weight loss goals this year, so bye bye. If you are my family member reading this and didn’t realize I enjoy an occasional glass of wine, surprise?

I will continue to lift weights because not only do I enjoy it, I like how my body looks once I do start to lose weight, while lifting weights. This has been made very clear to me this year. I won’t however be lifting heavy weights with the intention to build muscle. Instead I will be lifting moderate weight, high reps and sets for the purpose of weight loss, plus I enjoy it.


So these are my goals for 2016, this little detour I’ve been on, while NOT fun, has definitely taught me a lot about myself, what I want, how I want my body to look and feel. Now it’s time to put this all into action.

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