The other day, while I was in the gym, it struck me…..
I kinda like my body
This is a HUGE and NEW revelation for me
You see, I have always, for as long as I can remember, hated my body.
I grew up in a family with a maternal grandpa who would refer to larger women as “heifers”. He and my grandma had written me a letter once when I was a sophomore In college telling me how they were concerned I had gained weight. Mind you, I had gained the typical freshman 15 BUT when I entered college I was borderline anorexic (weighed about 160), wasn’t eating and was over exercising, so their letter really messed with my psychy. Plus during this time, I was coming out of a bad relationship where the boyfriend would tell me things like: you really should lose your stomach fat, it can cause cancer etc. Which all I heard was, “you’re fat and unlovable”
So for most of my young adult years, I HATED my body….
So it struck me the other day as I was walking on the treadmill and I looked down and felt proud.
Proud of how far I’ve come….
Not just physically, although I’m quite impressed with myself….haha
But how I think about my body.
I no longer look in the mirror and scoff at what I see.
Instead, I look in the mirror and feel pride.
I no longer look in the mirror and see all my flaws, rather a strong woman who has overcome a lot of adversity, be it mental and physical, to become the strong healthy version of me I see today.
This is a HUGE HUGE victory for me.
I know that I will always have my imperfections, but today I can say that it’s those imperfections that make me beautiful.