So exactly one year ago today, I weighed in at 315lbs. I was no longer in denial about my weight gain. I had used my health as my excuse for far to long. Sure I had been dealt a raw hand with a brain tumor, brain surgery, AVM, radiation and stroke, BUT that was no excuse to continue eating myself to death. And eating myself to death was EXACTLY what I was doing. So one year ago when I stepped on the scale and weighed in at 315 I thought my world would end. I remember inching up to 280 after I had my second child and I remember saying to my husband if I ever reach 300 just shoot me.
Then there I was with 300 staring me in the face. I felt like I had gained so much that I couldn’t possibly lose it on my own. So when I spoke to my sister in law at Christmas 2013 and heard her journey into the bariatric world, something click in my mind. So I jumped in and did my homework. It’s funny that prior to 300lbs bariatric surgery wasn’t even on my radar. I was always so judgemental of people who had the surgery. I was the sterotypical person who thought, “ha they took the easy way out”, “they had no will power” etc. I hate to admit it, but it’s how I thought of the bariatric community.
But sitting at 315, I knew two things:
1. I was ALWAYS hungry. So I knew decreasing my calories and exercising more yes I would lose weight, BUT I would constantly be starving and I knew for me this just wasn’t an option.
2. I didn’t want to say, “if I hit 400lbs just shoot me” Thank God, I knew that with my apathy at that point in life I WOULD end up at 400lbs. If I didn’t do something drastic
So the Monday after Thanksgiving 2013 I had my first consult with a bariatric surgeon. Hindsight, I wish I would have taken more time to really be happy with my surgeon selection. This is the ONLY thing I would have changed about my experience, but I have since switched bariatric programs and LOVE my new surgeon and nutritionist.
I knew that the surgery combined with my love to exercise. (Yes I was ALWAYS the 300lb fat girl dying on the treadmill at the gym) armed with counseling. I would be unstoppable!!
So here I am, exactly one year later to the day when I weighed 315 and I weigh in today at 226. I’m 89lbs down with only between 60-78 more pounds to lose and I’m thankful. I’m thankful that God was judgmental toward me for deciding to have bariatric surgery. I’m thankful that I’ve chosen to implement a healthy lifestyle through EATING (something the bariatric community doesn’t really do, but that’s another post for another day) AND, exercise, my increased passion.
Sure I still have a ways to go….I desperately want to be out of the 200s and yes I’ll get there. BUT I LOVE me. I love how healthy I feel! I love that I can participate in activities with my kids (I WILL go sledding this winter and ice skating), I love that my migraines have become almost nonexistent, which is due to this lifestyle change, I love that I’m happy. I love taking selfies, something I would NEVER do at 315lbs because I felt repulsive and ugly. I love me!